Haute Mamas Live your Dreams. Urban Bohemian Kadia.

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Kadia. New York City. May 2015.

We have a lot of dreams, even as moms and Kadia is living them..we should all remember that even having the huge responsibility of kids, shouldn’t stop us from reaching for our desires and passions..it’s obviously a great excuse, but in the long run, it may lead to regret.

Tell Me More Kadia: I was born in Bern, Switzerland to father Bosar, a Jazz musician of Yemeni-Israeli decent and Swiss mother Verena, a peace activist. I graduated from the Lee Strasberg Theatre and Film Institute in New York. I am currently working with Mary Boyer of MTB Studio on a weekly basis and at The Cinematic Fight Studio perfecting my skills in Combat, Full Contact Martial Arts, Kick Boxing, Swords, Fire Arms and Archery. I am also a yoga instructor, Medic and fluently speak English, Hebrew, German and Swiss German.

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Kadia, seen here with her three kids, hanging on a Sunday in NYC. Kadia is signed on to a major acting agent, and is working so hard to live her creative dream. Check her acting out here, www.kadiasaraf.com

Kadia is a mom who inspires me – she left a tough situation after getting sick, and went back to her lifelong dream of acting. IT’s not easy, but Kadia is living the life she wants, and it takes a lot of courage to leave the comforts of a certain life, and dive head first into a life less predictable.  Like raising three kids alone, while pursuing an acting career and teaching yoga.

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Kadia dresses like a free spirit, and most of her clothing is from Free People, www.freepeople.com

Kadia makes her own dreamcatcher necklaces and dreamcatchers, which she sells at Rain Shop on Etsy. Kadia is like me, she wears gold hoops and accessories while doing yoga..I so appreciate that.

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Floral sneakers are by Etnies.

Kadia is always on the run, so she needs comfortable shoes living in an urban jungle…

How do you make time for yourself? I make sure to leave time for me so I get up at 5:55 a.m.  and meditate, write my gratitude and affirmations. After, I do the drop off I run for an hour, only then I start addressing the world.

I have to say, I wish I was consistent about waking up early to write or workout.  It gives you time to yourself, and you are ready to deal with the day—because you already accomplished so much.  Kadia has created structure, and it obviously works.

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YOGA AND THE CITY

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Kadia’s external strength is due to her internal strength. Learning more about Kadia makes me realize that nothing should stop ME from pursuing my dreams – determination and persistence are key, and excuses don’t work.  Sometimes we say we’re too old, We’re too young, we have kids, we need to go back to school, we’re overweight..whatever the case may be, I feel bad that I’ve let certain things stop me…and I hope I will think of a mom like Kadia, who is working hard, facing rejection, getting up at the crack of dawn..all to be who she wants to be… oh and she’s raising three kids alone.

Haute Restaurateur Mama. Weekend Drop-Off.

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Vanessa. Mom. Model. Restaurateur. Marin County, March 2015.

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Vanessa is one of the owners of the Real Restaurants Group, www.realrestaurants.com – They include local and famed, Picco, Buckeye Bungalow and Bar Bocce. When I stopped Vanessa, I knew she was a model. She’s a woman you notice, her beauty is obvious, but her smile, warmth and charm are what captivated me.

Sometimes beauty can be intimidating.  Individuals I know who are model beautiful have explained (don’t roll your eyes) having to play down their looks to seem more approachable. I know it’s hard to believe, but it’s true. I once wrote about beauty being intimidating in this HuffPost piece, http://www.huffingtonpost.com/mara-menachem/beauty_b_2480591.html?

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This is why I believe in the power of a smile. I smile at people all the time — I’m sure it seems weird.  When I was eating at Elio’s on the Upper East Side of Manhattan, a group of people sat eating dinner – a woman looked in my direction, I gave her a huge smile, taken by surprise, she looked at me and reciprocated. As she walked out to leave, she walked up to me and said “I was so taken a back by your beautiful smile – no one does that anymore.  It’s a simple gesture, that means so much, so thank you for reminding me of that.”. She then mentioned the huge piece of broccoli stuck in my teeth.

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Fashion Notes: Boots: Enzo Angiolini, Top: Ralph Lauren, Jeans: Avedon by Citizens of Humanity, Sunglasses: Gucci imported from Italy, Handbag: Pikolinas

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I love Vanessa’s handbag.  It’s nice to carry something that’s so unique with no logos. Although I love a classic designer bag – especially vintage, I usually wear bags with no obvious labels.

I have frequented many of Vanessa’s spots, they are bustling and alive – kind of like The Smith’s song “take me out tonight, because I want to see people and I want to see life”.

Chanel, Dior, LV Bags. 7 Inch Heels. How Miami Recycles.

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Melissa Clarin. Founder, Pinecrest Marketplace. Miami, Florida.

My friend Melissa Clarin is the opposite of me – she’s decisive, organized, structured and neat – all while being really fun. Melissa is a lot like the character Olivia Pope in Scandal. Melissa is a fixer. Melissa had an idea to help people sell their unwanted goods to people in a safe manner..She formed a membership only group in Miami, where you have to know someone to be invited.  Melissa’s unwavering dedication and no ounce of ADD, has grown her idea into a huge revenue builder for Miami. I’m proud of my friend, a Haute Mom and entrepreneur.  

Your Weight Loss is our Gain, and other benefits of Pinecrest Marketplace

Who knew old stuff would bring a community together? I’ve been watching you Pinecrest Marketplace.  Your expensive stilettos, designer handbags, spiked heels, Mid-Century Modern furniture and some clothing that still hasn’t made its way back in fashion.  I’ve appreciated and participated in the Facebook banter regarding posted items.  And I’ve witnessed first hand, how selling and buying other people’s stuff has brought a community closer.

As a lover of all things worn, old, retro, vintage and just plain used, I’ve been drooling over some of the items on Pinecrest Marketplace.  A Fendi bag in animal print reminiscent of Carrie Bradshaw, a Chanel fanny pack (which I coveted, but couldn’t afford), beaded dresses fit for a Novella etc…who knew your old stuff would make fellow Miami residents more stylish?

Pinecrest Market Place has taught me a lot about human behavior, oh and my rule adhering friend Melissa. Melissa has to be a strict enforcer, because let’s face it–all of us would break the rules if we could.  I’ve pointed out my various observations to Melissa, with not much validation. She’s not in this to judge, only to make our lives easier. So since I live in California now, and don’t have to deal with your reaction to my witty commentary – here are some tips I’ve put together:

Bargains: Reducing something by $5.00 is not a bargain. May I suggest using percentages to make it seem like a really good deal.

Your fashion mistake is another person’s fashion triumph:  Aren’t you Pinecrest fashionistas so lucky? The fashion mistakes of your past, are now the investments of your future. And since when do bad fashion decisions come with a surplus of cash?

Your weight loss is our Gain: CrossFit, the biggest thing to hit the suburbs since Jane Fonda’s 1980’s hey day – has transformed your body into a lean muscle machine. In other words, you will no longer wear anything that doesn’t cling to those hard earned muscles. Lucky for you, Pinecrest Marketplace has people happy to buy your gently used Lululemon yoga pants and sports bras. Ya see your weight loss is our gain..well, in workout clothing.

Community: When I was shopping on Craigs List, I always said to myself, “is this ___ worth the possibility of being murdered?” Now, all you think about is if the item is worth selling to someone who lives in your community, has mutual friends, and knows where you live.  This knowledge ensures quality..because no one wants to disappoint fellow neighbors.  Melissa has created a safe and easy way to sell our old and new shit… and we love her for that.

Stripper Shoes: Donate them to The Booby Trap. Miami already has a reputation that’s been hard to dismantle. Acrylic shoes are the official shoe wear of strippers, which is great for “show” business. But not a mother negotiating the ridiculous deli line at Publix, In an attempt to get sliced turkey for her kids lunches. I even slipped across a grocery store floor in reasonable ankle boots.  Wearing these 7-inch acrylic heels could cause any innocent person, no matter how coordinated, a debilitating neck injury. (BUT if you do see a mom at school drop-off in this get up, please send me a photo ASAP for Haute Drop-Off), my website is www.hautedropoff.com – please send all stripper mom photos via the link.

Another Man’s trash IS another man’s treasure: This does not apply to used undergarments.  The funny thing about PMP, is that we all know each other. And that still hasn’t stopped these listings.  No level of embarrassment has stopped you guys from listing used underwear and bras.  Believe me when I say this, unless they are Mick Jagger’s old tighty whities, no one and I mean no one will buy or take used underwear for free. When you’ve retired your undergarments, please dispose of them immediately.

Bad Fashion Mistakes: I’m sorry to break the news, if you notice ridiculous amounts of listings for “specific” logo’d gems, this is a clear indication that even in suburban Miami, no one wants them.  Old 1990’s suits? Some maybe from The Limited Express? I’m ashamed that you’ve held onto these garments, but please don’t perpetuate the 1990’s era of bad suits, if you care at all about Pinecrest maintaining some dignity.

Follow the Rules: The person at the helm of PMP, is one of the most organized, detail oriented humans I know. Melissa is soley responsible for taking our clutter and baggage, and turning it into an organized revenue stream for Pinecrest.  Now, I will say Melissa is strict, that’s true. She will not bend the rules, and for someone like me who constantly breaks rule–it’s especially difficult dealing with someone who’s fair. But that’s why PMP is a great success, and will continue to grow and prosper. Oh and if you missed the boat on early membership, start hoarding now – I hear PMP is harder to get into then a packed night at Zuma.

Bootlegs and Lace

Haute MAMA. LA Drop-Off. Art’s Coolest Players.

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Adarsha, Joe and Juniper. MAMA Gallery. Los Angeles. 2015. Photographs by Angela Izzo

Photos: Fashion shots by the INCREDIBLE Angela Izzo. Look forward to another post about Angela’s work. She’s a filmmaker, photographer and creative visionary. Her resume is an impressive one, shooting celebrities, artists, musicians etc..but her unique ability to capture a moment in time, is something I admire greatly. Check out her work, http://www.izzoimages.com

Fashion Notes: Adarsha is wearing an African inspired print dress with gold accessories. Juniper is dressed in J Brand. Joe is wearing a T-shirt from American Apparel.

Red Lips: And lets not forget Adarsha’s red lipstick – a must for every blonde woman! It has to be the right shade, or it looks severe. I’ve tried pulling off red lipstick, and my kids seem traumatized every time I attempt it. I feel to “VA VA VOOM” and like I should be working for Heidi Fleiss. Here are some tips, http://beauty.allwomenstalk.com/dos-and-donts-of-wearing-red-lipstick-that-any-makeup-lover-should-know

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Adarsha grew up in Brooklyn in a free spirited family (i’m tight with Adarsha’s sister). Her sophisticated taste in art, design and clothing is inspired by this upbringing.  Being raised in a major city causes accidental exposure. When you walk, take the subway or a public bus – you are constantly observing people  – places – things.

Adarsha founded and directs the recently opened MAMA Gallery in LA. With a diverse range of instillations and exhibits, it’s not surprising that MAMA is the new kid on the block, receiving lots of attention from the Contemporary Art world.

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MAMA Gallery gives a peak at the multi-dimensional world of art – how creativity can be executed using a multitude of materials and mediums.  For major inspiration, check out MAMA in LA, http://www.mama.gallery and for suggestions on current pieces for sale, call the gallery. And you’ll be inspired by Adarsha’s fresh perspective on the Contemporaty Art world.

As a new mom, Adarsha has made the gallery a visual playground for Juniper – pretty inspiring for a child to be surrounded by multi-faceted creative visions.

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Gold earrings by Anna Sheffield.

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I’ve been lucky to be exposed to contemporary art by my step-father. I love visiting the galleries in Chelsea, like the Famed Gagosian Gallery, http://www.gagosian.com and have had the privilege of attending Art Basel in Miami most years.  It’s great to see the next generation of galleries popping up with new artists and inspirations.

When in LA, visit MAMA  – I promise you will leave feeling inspired. Art is an investment, but should be purchased when you truly feel connected with the piece.

 

 

 

Sex. Motherhood. Individuality. This Artist Provokes.

People have always asked me, “So Mara, you grew up with so many men in your life, are you the “girl” who has no women friends?” This is not the case, I adore women – and without my amazing sisters no one would validate my unique blend of Mara crazy.  Susan Copich, with her latest photographic series entitled “Domestic Bliss” reminds me of  long conversations I’ve had with so many of my friends, but especially my friend Susana.  The calls usually consist of me expressing my inner fantasies and engaging in dialogue about societal rules.

Susana usually reminds me that, I don’t follow that many rules, and sites my constant interactions with the authorities. But it’s not the rules I care so much about – it’s the offspring.  When we become mothers, we know as intuitive, intelligent and responsible women that we must adhere to some guidelines….like not escaping to India for three months to “find ourselves”, but instead taking yoga with an Indian instructor.  

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“Mommy Time” from Domestic Bliss Photo Series by Susan Copich (pictured above)

Adrienne Rich, the American Poet wrote about “Motherhood as an institution”, she freely through poetry revealed almost an obsession with retaining one’s self after becoming a mother. The above photograph to me, is an Adrienne Rich poem brought to life.

After I had a baby, I was generously invited by women I didn’t know to join a mommy group. From the first get together, I left feeling depressed.  I left the intellectual stimulation of my work at United Way to discuss baby blankets and teething.  My individuality seemed meaningless, I felt trapped in a sea of emptiness – and felt confused as the role of young woman and mature mother came together.  Leading a “traditional” life was not something I ever thought about, but it happened – and it happened when I was too young to understand the depth of my feelings.  Relating to other women because they have kids, is a ridiculous notion – and it made me feel like I didn’t belong in the club of motherhood.

Because none of my close friends were even in serious relationships at that time, I was lonely on planet motherhood..and forced to find friends who could relate. Only, that proved difficult. I remember meeting other mothers and thinking, are they satisfied being “only” mothers? They discussed their life with spouse and offspring like they were rock stars on stage…So why the hell did I feel like I needed a life outside all this domesticity?

NOW, I know, it’s because like Adrienne Rich, I was obsessed (without knowing) with retaining my self outside of motherhood. And this is when I decided to not discuss my children, when I was out at night. Little did I know, I was embarking on my own feminism experiment all while questioning social norms.

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“Mother’s Milk” from Susan Copich’s Domestic Bliss Photo Series (Susan pictured above)

Attachment and freedom. Sexuality, Individuality and Motherhood.  I’m writing this as I multi-task giving love and care to my youngest, who’s home sick from school.  Liam saw the above shot, and with eyes wide open said “If you made me do that, I would push you and run”. It’s hard to examine something like motherhood without realizing the economic component of Feminism. I have choices, I was able to stay home today and write.  I don’t have to worry about work- child care..it’s easy for me. I have privilege, and therefore; choices. 

Kids open you up to so much, but allow you the excuse to not take risks. Motherhood is a constant struggle as an individual to adhere to social norms, even when you think they are bullshit and stifling.  The struggle is the judgement that comes with rejecting those unwritten rules.

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Susan and her daughters. Upstate New York. January 2015.

Fashion Notes: Jacket: Helmut Lang, Black Skinny Jeans: Citizens of Humanity, Boots: Ugg, Sunglasses: Morgenthal Frederics. The girls are wearing leggings by Carrots, Down Jackets by Canada Goose and Boots by Bogg

Susan Copich: Susan is the photographer and artist behind the acclaimed photo series, “Domestic Bliss”.  With a number of collections housed at The Moen Mason Gallery, http://www.moenmasongallery.com.  Susan’s latest, “Domestic Bliss” series is beyond worthy of the attention.   This particular series in Susan’s body of work is based on her personal experiences as a mother and has touched a nerve.  From the moment my friend forwarded me the link to Susan’s photographs, I immediately wanted to talk about these shots.  Susan captures the struggle, and poked fun of it at the same time. Susan Copich’s series is so thought provoking, It has caused me to intellectualize the shit out of women – motherhood- partnership -Susan made me think and that’s the sign of a great artist.  http://susancopich.com

 

 

 

Mara Menachem, The Bill Cunningham of Parent Fashion

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Well Guys, I’m pretty excited because this really authentic, cool and stylish Miami mama is giving me mad props (I know people don’t say that anymore, I’m bringing it back).  Annhy is like many of my “sisters” who are proud of me, and show me off – usually it involves some weird dorky dance move.  But Annhy who hardly knows me, has taken how embarrassingly describe Haute Drop-Off – usually in a low voice, to not get heels hurled in my direction, and vocalized it loudly.  And I love her for that. We should all, including me, stop being so afraid of exaggerating our skills….Gosh Darn it, I am the Bill Cunningham for Parent Style, and soon enough, The New York Times will add me to their fashion section and my mother will be able to properly show me off.

So Annhy started a great blog, I mostly love it because she’s so honest and funny, and she’s a looker – which always helps. So enjoy this piece about your very own Mara, and read about why I feel guilty at Guilt Free Mom Moments, http://fomib.com/2015/01/23/hooray-haute-drop-off/

Brooding Voice. Haute Musician Papa. Bohemian Drop-Off.

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Jeremy. Dad. Musician. Fairfax, California. January 2015.

If anyone could be a style poster child for Fairfax, a bohemian town in Marin County, California–Jeremy would be it. Jeremy has the soul of an artist, and now the soul of a daddy. Jeremy is a musician, playing guitar and singing in the band San Geronimo.  I first heard this band play at a bar, that to me, seemed like it had to be fake and on some movie set. But it wasn’t, this place called Rancho Nicasio is deep in Marin County, and feels like what my image of a 1960 rural hippie town would appear to be.  I even spotted an identical human replica of David Crosby.

Jeremy’s voice is brooding and captivating, but I’m not really a music critic.  What I do know, is that their version of Lyle Lovett’s If I had a Boat will touch you deeply..and make you fall in love with their sound. San Geronimo plays every Thursday at Terrapin Crossroads in San Rafael, owned by famed Grateful Dead bassist, Phil Lesh.  They’ve played at The Great American Music Hall in San Francisco, as well as many other Bay Area venues.  Click the link below, to check them out:

http://www.sangeronimomusic.com

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Curl Doctor. LA Drop-Off. Haute & Famous Hair Stylist Papa.

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unnamedunnamedShai. Los Angeles, California. 2015.

Unless you have curly hair, you won’t relate to this at all. But curly hair people stick together, we can relate to the many, many awful hair cuts we’ve received. When I was a little girl, I had long, thick and knotty hair -So thick, I almost drowned from my hair blinding me while swimming.  I wish the former was one of my Mara exaggerations, but it’s actually true. I think that’s when I decided to chop that drowning hazard off, so I looked at some magazines for inspiration. My former self, decided to go with whatever the supermodels were sporting, because at 8 with a heap load of self-esteem (before it was slowly ripped away), I thought I looked very similar to the girls in the fashion rags.

But the issue my friends, was not me; a naive young girl.  The issue was with the hair stylist. How dare she not warn me of what curly, thick hair looks like when it’s short.  Who wouldn’t point out that the model in the fashion magazine I chose, actually had thin, straight and blonde hair – and a thin symmetrical face, I might add?  I was so little, I didn’t even care that after the haircut, people kept saying to my mom, “wow, you have four boys” – it took me a month to catch on to my change from girl to boy, merely from a pair scissor shears.

I grew my hair back (put a stop to all swimming activities), and really had no trauma from the incident. Back then, I had a great attitude about beauty, and rarely showered – so the fact that I looked like a boy, didn’t mean much.  But this incident is only a small example of the hair situations I’ve been involved, because of my curly/wavy hair.  And if I knew someone like Shai, the Curl Doctor, just maybe, just maybe – I could of avoided multiple awkward hair situations over the years.

Shai Amiel is a Los Angeles based stylist, a guru in the curly hair community – with the nickname “Curl Doctor” it’s no wonder Shai has curly hair groupies, including a long list of celebrities.  Shai is the owner and master cutter at Capella Salon in Studio City.  In addition to running this successful salon with his wife, Shai is a dad, who has lots of fun long boarding.

Fashion Notes: Shai loves hats and scarves..and he wears them quite well. He also works in lots of man jewelry – cool bracelets and necklaces..which I really dig. It’s tough for a guy to get away with wearing jewelry, but Shai makes it work like a charm. Please read below for the best tips for curls, Shai’s CurlMandments….beauty tips and wit  – love this dad! If you live in LA, check out Shai at http://www.capellasalon.com

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She Adorns the Famous and the Stylish. Haute Bobbie.

DSC_0060DSC_0083DSC_0056DSC_0064Bobbie. Jewelry Designer. Mom. Coconut Grove, Florida. January 2015.

Fashion Notes: Bobbie: Silk Lace Kimono: Soah, Funky Boho Heels: Ralph Lauren Collection, Jumpsuit: Hommage LA, Fringe Bag (I am obsessed): Purchased in Morocco, All Jewelry: Musa Chloe (Bobbie’s daughter): Dress: Urban Outfitters, Cardigan: Bought in a Vintage store in Europe, Socks: Urban Outfitters, Shoes: Thrift Store, Backpack: Kipling, Jewelry: Musa.  Bobbie’s style is very “Mara” – the bag I adore, and the layering of accessories – it’s like looking in a candy store..I want it all!! Including Bobbie’s glowing skin.  Chloe, Bobbie’s daughter adores thrift stores and searching for cool items to wear- she has a great sense of style..and I’m pretty sure I know where she got her initial inspiration.

Musa Jewelry: Bobbie’s company Musa, is the Spanish word for muse.  Musa pieces are not only funky, beautiful and stylish, but each piece has a special meaning and intention.  Bobbie’s designs include various gemstones and crystals, because of the healing powers of these stones.  Many of Musa’s collectors adorn the beads for pure spirituality, and some for pure body decoration :).

About Bobbie: A former magazine writer and stylist, Bobbie began collecting beads during her travels.  Bobbie’s natural bohemian style and sensibility, led her to create unique designs with a deeper meaning.  It’s all very California!  And I’ll tell you, Musa Jewelry has quite the A List following (I’m talking about me, of course).  Although, I’m not one to be impressed with celebrity fashion–I’m proud that Bobbie’s pieces are being appreciated by many majorly fashionable people.

Who’s Rockin’ Musa: Lenny Kravitz has been photographed wearing Musa’s black beads (so sexy on men), and apparently they fell off while he was crowd surfing at a show – -they were quickly replaced on the style icon’s wrist.  Uma Thurman, the Von Furstenberg Family (yes, as is Diane), Marie Chantal of Greece’s royal family and the Givenchy Family are all fans of Musa.  Donna Karan, Beyonce and Jennifer Lopez all own pieces from Musa’s collection.  Diane Von Furstenberg’s bed became an impromptu pop-up shop for Musa Jewelry.

For information about Musa and to purchase, click below;

http://musa-jewelry.myshopify.com

Haute Malibu. Actor-Surfer-Cowboy-Cool Dad at Drop-Off.

unnamed-6Rodger Halston. Dad. Actor. Malibu, California. December 2014.

Fashion Notes: Rodger, Shoes: Clarks, Jeans: Levis, Flannel: Abercrombie, Vest: One Star, Sunglasses: Ray Ban. Avalon, Kicks: Converse, Jeans: Joe’s Jeans, Vest: Pop Out, Tank Top and Back Pack: Roxy

About: Rodger and family live in Malibu, where he takes advantage of the California life style.  His talents are abundant…. Actor, Musician, Singer, Surfer, Skateboarder, Cowboy, Writer, Producer, Director, Motivational Speaker and DAD.  I don’t know what it means to be a cowboy, but it sounds pretty fun.

Hair: I mean can this dad get any cooler? Rodger is a great looking dude, with major style and an awesome beard.  I have this beard style philosophy  – it can’t be neat or overly trimmed. A beard I like, is more free spirited in its presentation.  A little messy and unruly, but only slightly…Rodger has perfected my beard ideal. The long, straight hair reminds me of late 70’s folk rock hair…it just fits this dad well, and man is he lucky!

Style: I love the fitted vest with a little plaid peaking though – -and the thick wrist cuff.  A great example for men on how to wear accessories. The rolled sleeve is a great way to add some masculinity to any look – especially when its plaid.

Film: Below is a photo of Rodger from his upcoming Universal Pictures film, Scorpion King Quest for Power.  Check out this stylin’ dad in his new film coming out in January.

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